My Gap Year Not Ruined

DMC 020 poem, by participants and staff

When we started DMC,
I didn’t know what was coming.
For some time, I was extremely bothered that my gap year got “ruined”.

I didn’t really know how I want to grow
or in what direction.
I was scared to go deeper.

Taking responsibility for your own life is hard.

DMC was a really honest mirror for me.
This wasn’t a time of surviving.
It was a time of learning and practicing.

I don’t want to be a selfish bystander anymore.
I don’t want to live a passive life.
I don’t want to prioritise being liked by everyone anymore, even though it’s nice.

I want to approach life differently.
I want to doubt myself less.
If I give away my responsibility,
I give away my freedom.

My want to be better for others,
overpowers my want to be comfortable.
I want to make better decisions;
Don’t aim for average.

It takes commitment to grow,
and a commitment to never give up.
But I’ve realised I don’t have to do everything alone.

I had a longing to call people my companions of faith.
We need companions of faith.
A lot of growth comes from talking with each other.
It’s the quality of my relationships
that reflect the quality of my life.
I can see more clearly the purpose of life –
I just need to look at my sister. And my dad.

I can see that I’m going in the right direction.

The place I can grow is right now,
whatever and wherever that is.
That’s life –
taking responsibility and overcoming things.

It’s my responsibility to never give up on pursuing goodness.
My room will be full of post-its.

I had a great gap year.

I remember a lot of moments when I felt lighter because of a lecture, a prayer or just seeing everybody’s faces.
I’m still scared of finding my place in the world, but I know where to start now.
Now is the time where we make major decisions in our life;
We should be creative.

All I’ve ever wanted to do is be a good person and I didn’t think that I needed a life of faith to do that.
But a few weeks ago, I had this massive urge to get to know God.
I have been educated and taught about God and his love for basically all my life.
But I realised a connection and love for God is not something you can be taught.
It’s something you have to want.

Now, I want to do life together with God.
My goal is sincerely to have God in my life,
living with God and listening.
I want to live a life that would make God happy.

There is so much to come;
I feel my life will be much fuller than I realised up until now.
We are all part of a big story,
and now it is our turn.
God needs our help to make the world a better place.
Please be hopeful, not hopeless.
Let’s make families God is proud of.

For some time, I was extremely bothered that my gap year got “ruined”.
But I had a great gap year.

Oh goodness, my heart.
It’s been so good, it hurts.

The quality of the environment may change, but the quality of my heart won’t.

I want to live a better life.